For a moment, my heart just sank thinking that I cut out my dreads based on something outside of my”self”… and I feel like my spirit is best expressed and feels most beautiful inside and out with my lonnggggg, old dreadies. Isn’t that funny, how the ego can identify with HAIR?!! Such a trip. Anyway, yeah, I miss my dreads. I’ve been going through some weavings, in and out of confidence, and it’s all related to my hair… not to say that I didn’t have any problems before this… but… with dreads, I can’t explain it, I just felt like a goddess. I felt my spirit soar. I was able to really just radiate in a way that I haven’t yet with my hair cut. I know I’ll grow used to it… and i need to ground my”self” in the original intentions I held while I cut them out and brushed them… It’s just such a journey. Ego is a triiiippppp.
She was tied to the moon by long threads of red tangled blood. She moved like a woman tied to the moon… it enveloped her and it opened her to an absolute night without dawn.
My heart hurts, I miss the desert so much.
It feels odd not being on O’odham lands.
I’ve barely smiled at all today. “Home” is an odd place. Old habit patterns of reacting really get to me.